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My Uncle
My uncle is really funny. He isn't funny because of his jokes, its because of what he does. Here is a list of all the things he has done:
> Rung doorbells of random neighbors to sign a petition so Mr. Softy's Ice Cream Truck can come to the neighbor hood and my uncle is in his 50's
> He collects grocerie coupons until he has a huge stack and when he buys a big load of groceries, he hands the cashier more coupons than she can check. He gets money off the total even if he didn't buy the product.
> He thinks yellow M&M's taste like lemons so he calls them LemonM's.
> He calls coupons Jewpons
> He buys a bag of popcorn that has free refills at the movie theater and takes it home with him so next time he goes, he gives them the bag and they refill it for him. One time, the employee said "We don't use these bags anymore..."
> He goes to concerts of bands that used to be famous 35 years ago and now they are all in their 60's.
> He invited us to lunch one day because he had coupons for "buy 5 pizzas for the price of 2.5"
>On the 4th of July, we were doing fireworks and we let my uncle do the morters. Those are those profetional firewroks but this was a smaller version (still really big). He put the thing in upside down. Instead of launching up, we heard that noise, but nothing came out. Just as we thought it was a dud, the launcher and everything blew up. Sparks came out everywhere. After it was over, the launch tube was gone along with the morter. With cars and people all in the street, luckily no one got hurt (and no cars blew up either).
I will add more things he has done when he has done more things.
>He was thinking of names for my brother's band. There is a whole list which I put on another page.
>We sent him a Bar Mitzvah invitation. The RSVP card already had the envelope and stamp so all the person needs to do is fill out the card and seal the envelope. My uncle came over here to give us the RSVP card because he wanted to save the stamp. He saved 37 cent.
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My Grandpa
Here is a list of things my grandpa has done.
> He gave the cashier 5 dollars worth of Toys R Us money thinking it was the new 5 dollar bill and the girraffe was our new president(seriously).
> He is walking accross the street and he sees lottery tickets in the middle of the road so he picks them up and walks back to put them back in his car.
> He is walking accross the street again and their are cars on both sides beeping at him and he doesn't notice. He is just walking along, slowly.
> He is driving on the dotted line in the middle of the road.
> He is in the right lane for a left turn at an intersection.
There are sooooooo many things with my grandpa but you need to see it like the time we were playing Catch Phrase, the word was loose cannon and he throws his fist making a "woosh" sound. The difference between my uncle and my grandpa is that my uncle knows what he is doing, he just doesn't know how stupid it is. My grandpa has no idea what he is doing and wonders why we are all laughing.
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The Old Singer to my Brothers Band
The old singer to my brothers band was TBS (very funny). Here are some things that he has done:
> Walks into Victoria Secrets and holds up a bathing suit in front of him seeing if it fits.
> Walks into a cosmetics store and uses the sample exfoliating soap more than it should be used. He just sat there for about ten minutes scooping up the soap and rubbing it. The employees came over to get him another bottle because he used it all up. The people in the store were just staring at him but he had no clue why. His hands became red and raw. This was in a shopping mall. Then, we left to walk around and he saw one of those kiosk stand things with video games. One of them was a virtual tennis game where you had a tennis racket and as the ball came on the screen, you swing the racket. He ran to try it. He was swinging that thing so hard, even when the ball wasn't coming. He was also standing 2 feet away from the TV. The salesman came over to him asking him to either stop or move away from the TV and not swing so hard. The singer just ignored him. He kept swinging. When the singer was finally done, he handed the racket to the guy. His hands left the handle all greasy and the salesman yelled at him. Later that day, we were still in the mall. He saw a krepe stand. He randomly asks the chef if he can make a krepe. The chef lets him in and shows him how to make a krepe. He made one and the chef asks him if he wants a part time job there. The singer said he would take the job but he never showed up. hehe.
> We were playing spider man for Xbox and Josh (the singer) climbs the highest building and jumbs off. The he screams sooo loud, the neighbors probably heard it 3 houses down. He screamed like it was actually him falling.
> On his birthday, he was wearing a "Barbie", birthday, cone shaped hat with a barbie doll in his hand.
Josh just has no idea what he is doing. He is just as oblivious as my grandpa!
Who is the funniest?
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